Aug 252013

Here’s what you need to know about putting your dog to sleep. Veterinarian Marie Haynes shares the most important criteria for putting a dog down and offers help for healing.

6 Signs It's Time to Put a Dog to Sleep

Animals and the Afterlife

One of the best ways to cope with your dog’s death is believing that their souls and spirits live on – and you’ll be reunited one day. Read Animals and the Afterlife: True Stories of Our Best Friends’ Journey Beyond Death  to learn how some pet owners experience their beloved animal companions after their pets died.

Are you confused about putting your dog to sleep? You’re not alone if you feel devastated, guilty, sad, and lost. This information about pet euthanasia is from a veterinarian who had to put her own dog to sleep. She shares her story, and offers general information about the process of putting a dog down.

This is the most important thing to remember about putting your dog to sleep: “If you can save your dog or cat even one day of discomfort, you must,” says Dr Haynes.

Is It Time to Put Your Dog to Sleep?

The number one sign it’s time to put your dog to sleep is quality of life. If your dog is suffering in any way, then it’s time to say good-bye.

I hope this article on putting a dog down helps you cope with this difficult decision. I can’t tell you whether or not you should put your dog to sleep – only you can decide. But, this article may give you insight and clarity.

Dr Haynes says it’s often difficult to tell whether a dog is in pain or suffering, but there are some general guidelines it’s time to put your dog to sleep:

time to put dog down

“6 Signs It’s Time to Put a Dog to Sleep” image by Laurie

  1. Is your dog’s appetite suffering? If so, this can be a sign of pain.
  2. Does it seem like your dog is enjoying life?
  3. Does your dog still do the things that bring her joy?
  4. Are you enjoying having your dog around — or is there more pain than happiness?
  5. Does your dog seem happy more often than not?
  6. Does your dog look distressed or uncomfortable most of the time?

Here’s the bottom line about putting a dog down: There will come a day when it is absolutely clear to you that your dog is not enjoying life.  That day is one day too late.  If you can save your dog even one day of discomfort, you must.

As a dog lover, you want a clear answer about putting your dog to sleep, but it can’t just be the veterinarian’s decision. The vet only sees a snapshot of the pet’s life, while the pet owner has the big perspective.

“I see a scared, sick animal in the hospital,” says Dr Haynes. “You have taken care of your dog all its life. This is your final chance to take care of your pet.  If you can spare your dog pain and suffering, then putting it to sleep is the ultimate gift – no matter how hard it is for you.”

Putting your dog to sleep is difficult, but it could be the most loving thing you do for your dog. You can be present when you put your dog to sleep. Euthanasia is similar to falling asleep, and you can be with your dog when he or she drifts away. Dr Haynes says pet euthanasia is generally painless, and almost always goes smoothly.

Do you feel guilty about putting your dog to sleep? Read How Veterinarians Decide It’s Time to Put a Dog Down for guidance.

How Dr Haynes Decided to Put Her Dog to Sleep

“My shepherd/cattle dog cross, Eddie, had a multitude of problems and I couldn’t decide if it was time for euthanasia.  Then, one day he tore his cruciate ligament.  He had already previously torn the ligament on the other knee and although it was healed he had severe arthritis in that knee.  With both knees injured, Eddie was unable to walk.  My decision to put my dog to sleep was finally made for me.

should I put my dog down

6 Signs It’s Time to Put Your Dog to Sleep

I went to my office and collected the supplies I needed for euthanasia.  Eddie was such a good boy as I shaved his front leg and placed the needle in his vein.  I will never forget the look of love and trust he gave me as I made the injection.  Then, the life just went out of him and he was gone.  Once he had passed away, his buddy Joey (my other dog) came in the room but he did not seem to care about or comprehend what was happening.  Then, my two cats came in and I swear they suddenly had a look of glee in their eyes as Eddie was very much a cat tormentor!”

If you’re putting a dog down, remember to allow yourself to grieve. Take time to heal.

Help for Putting Your Dog to Sleep

Losing your dog is a heartbreaking experience. When I wrote Letting Go of an Animal You Love, I interviewed veterinarians, grief experts, and pet owners who had to say good-bye to their beloved animal companions.

It’s true that time does ease the pain of having to put a dog or cat to sleep, but it’s also good to learn what helped other people cope with the pain. For instance, I talked to one dog owner who got a paw print tattoo after putting her dog to sleep, as a way to remember her pet. I wouldn’t have thought of a tattoo, but she said she is comforted every time she sees it.

should I put my dog down

Dog Cremation Urn

If you want to keep your dog’s ashes, the Perfect Memorials Dog in Basket – Pet Cremation Urn pictured is a beautiful vessel.

I know it may seem too soon to think about cremation urns for your dog — you may want to stat by reading books about dog loss. Goodbye, Friend: Healing Wisdom for Anyone Who Has Ever Lost a Pet is Gary Kowalski’s second book on coping with a dog’s death, and it may help you heal after making the heart-wrenching decision to say good-bye.

And finally, How to Deal With Anger at Your Veterinarian is an article I wrote for a reader struggling to cope after putting her dog to sleep. It’s a difficult decision, but it’s sometimes the most compassionate thing you can do for your dog. But this final act of love can be destroyed by a veterinarian who is thoughtless or inept.

If you have any thoughts on putting your dog to sleep, please comment below. I can’t give advice, but writing can help you decide if putting your dog down is the right choice for you.

I invite you to share your thoughts below! I read every comment, but can't offer advice or even guarantee a personal response. Don't let this stop you from sharing -- writing often brings clarity and insight, and will show other readers they're not alone.

"I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in Him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit." - Romans 15:13

  450 Responses to “6 Signs It’s Time to Put Your Dog to Sleep”

  1. Hello All, I’ve been searching and searching on the net and I ended up here. Wondering what true dog owners and lovers would do? We have an 11 year old Doxie. His name is Louie and he has been battling Cushing for the past 4 years. 2 years ago we put him on medication but it seems no matter the dose or changes he is not getting better. He has a large list of symptoms… insatiable hunger to the point where he gets into things that could hurt him. Tears into cabinets at the hinges cause he thinks there may be food there. We started using a baby gate to keep him out of the kitchen and from hurting himself and I came home to a bloody destroyed fence and a dog with a broken tail. insatiable thirst, it is probably what kills me the most, I can’t imagine feeling, being, or dealing with being this thirsty. I find him in the bathtub in the middle of the night though he is too old to really even get in there. He is almost completely bald and is licking the remaining fur off all his paws. Other than food and drink he doesn’t do much, he can act spunky but for the most part just sleeps. He has in the last year started acting as though he has separation anxiety and barking all day long. He has also been having accidents in the house, not all the time but I know for an 11 year old trained dog this is not normal. He has always been a chill and an awesome dog but these past few years he isn’t the same dog at all. I recently found out that I was pregnant and it saddens me to think we may have to put him down. Sometimes I find him sleeping in random parts of the house sleeping by himself which is totally out of character of him. My husband and I have spent over $3500 this year alone and we are running out of savings. When we see the vet they always want more tests and more or different medication. Any advice (not in medical) but in passion is needed. I always thought we would have him so much longer than 11 years but I know this is not my same Louie we have had and the thought that he can’t be comfortable or may hurt himself when we are at work just has been so stressed. Pet owners, help…

    • Savannah I sympathize with you! I recently went through the same type of circumstance…..making the decision. After what I dealt with for my sweet 14 year old cocker spaniel Rylie, and what she went through, it truly comes down to making the decision based on your pet only. At 14 Rylie had arthritis which Pred kept under control. She ate, drank, went outside…..the normal things you think would keep you from putting a dog down. Unfortunately, she had a tumor in her ear canal and developed a chronic ear infection that became worse over time. It turned into pseudomonas and it’s resistant to most meds. After expensive injections, it cleared then came back. It was now resistant to that. We came to a wall, either do surgery which would remove her canal or just continue cleaning and try to keep her comfortable. She never showed pain and the vet said she was the best patient he’s ever had. A couple months ago it changed. So thinking of how horrible it must feel with all the bad stuff that goes along with this and she had started losing hair most likely from the infection going into her system, I knew she needed peace. She had a great Christmas and ate Prime Rib and more Prime Rib!!! It was her special day for love. On Dec 29th she crossed over to Rainbow Bridge. It is the hardest decision I’ve ever made, but it has to be yours and vets won’t tell you directly it’s time. I’m still grieving, I cry only because I miss her sassy butt barking every morning because I’m not getting her breakfast quick enough! I know it was the right choice, but that came the morning of. She was a snow bunny and would lay in it and eat it only coming in with the hope of more food then back out! It hadn’t really snowed and I had wished for 1 more snow for her…..that last sight of seeing her happy with frozen snowballs on her fur and face! It just melted my heart watching her and that morning it began to snow! Just enough to please her, I know it was a sign that she was ready. Savannah all I can do is tell you my experience and I hope it helps in your journey, a difficult journey. I know it’s peaceful and I held her every moment so she left here knowing the love she felt since we took home our little 8 week old runt of the litter with the adorable white stripe on her head! You will know in your heart what your furry baby needs! I’m here if you need someone!

    • Savannah, I’m so sorry. I truly understand! Please read about what I wrote in below comments. Sounds to me that another vet’s opinion may be needed. If your dog is having that many problems over such a long time and things aren’t better, and then the vet wants to do more treatments?? Doesn’t sound right. As much as we love our pets and don’t want to be without them, there comes a time when we must do what’s best for them AND us. You certainly don’t need this stress while being pregnant. What I did was try to put myself in their place. Would I want to live that way? It’s ok to put them down when their quality of life has diminished so badly. It’s also ok to feel badly, sadly, and to mourn. Don’t feel guilty. When you have those thoughts just replace them with a fond memory. It was one of the hardest decisions I ever had to make, but it was the right one. I will pray for you. Try to now concentrate on the new baby and yourself!

    • Oh my goodness Savannah, I am so sorry that your poor Louie is suffering and that you are faced with this heartache. I will be honest with you…if it were my dog I would most likely help Louie out of his misery. You have tried what you can, and he is not getting better–I am afraid he will only get worse. Poor Louie is trapped in a sick body, and life is not fun for him anymore. In fact life is probably pretty much miserable for him most days.

      I think if Louie were able to talk to you, he would say please let me go in peace.

      I am so sorry!

    • Savannah, So sad. If this were happening to a friend of yours, you were outside looking in, what would you say? How would you feel? When you are in the thick of it,(and could be you are extra emotional being pregnant,) and its your first, second or even third time around, with having to put a good dog down, its so very hard to be rational. I’m having do do it any day now with my 16 year young cattle dog /german shepherd who has never left my side. But for a killer tumor in her mouth, she is , was, perfectly healthy which makes me feel like a killer. I’m talking to a pet psychic tomorrow to see my dog’s side of things and hopefully release some of my overwhelmng fear. My higher enlightened self knows better about Life and Death, but I need assistance right now .Listen, what I really think, is that because you’re giving birth in the future, its best to take the steps you need to, and to try to heal from the grief, so as not to have your baby pick up on your raw sorrow.Try to resolve, be resolute, and most of all be kind to yourself . If you get another pet, I would not return to that vet. so sorry. Blessings.

  2. Thanks for all the stories. My 14 year old Pom is in the hospital he has a diagnosis of Addison Disease and I don’t won’t to put him through all the test and medications and reading others stories will help me to make the decision that I know I must do once I pick him up on tomorrow. He had not been eating or drinking so I had to take him in and this is what I found out that is wrong with him. I did research and he is not his self and I don’t won’t meds for the remaining of his life and he can’t truly be the dog I know. I just needed to hear other people stories because he is my baby and he has been with me and my husband for almost 15 years. He will be 15 this year he looks so sad and depressed. It hurts me to talk about it.

    • MIMI, I’m so sorry. It’s so hard to see our pets change, suffer, or just not be themselves. I’m the one with the two dachshunds that I put down two weeks ago. It was the hardest thing I ever did. Now that two weeks have passed I don’t miss them any less, but I feel I did what was best for them. My only advise is to consult your vet. You will know what to do and when. Listen to your heart. I couldn’t talk about it either without crying. It’s better now, but I still cry, I miss them so. Just remember there is another puppy/dog out there that can steal your heart when you are ready. We can never replace the ones we had but can learn to love a new pet.

    • I am so sorry about your dog’s diagnosis. I know that Addisons is petty common in dogs. I would say that 15 is a rile old age for most breeds. What does your vet say? I wonder if your dog can try the meds to see if it can feel better?

  3. I have an about 14 year old chocolate lab named Charlee. I say about 14 because I rescued him 5 years ago so don’t know his exact age. Charlee has hip dysplasia and lately he has been extra wobbley when walking around. For the past 2 days I have to help him up and sorta guide him outside when he goes to the restroom to make sure he doesn’t fall over. I know that if he can no longer get up on his own that I will have to put him down, but I guess because I have only had him 5 years I feel it is to soon. I am waiting out these next few days to see how charlee does. I guess I am just looking for reassurance or suggestions on what to do. Thanks

    • So sorry, it’s such a hard thing to go through. I just put my two dachshunds down this past Monday. You can read about it below. My husband and i finally got up the courage to do so. All the advise I can give you would be to try to put yourself in his place. Would he want to continue to go on in the state he’s in? What does your vet advise? What a blessing that you rescued him! Lucky dog! If your heart will allow you, there are many many more out there that need rescuing. We can never replace the dogs we have had, but we can build new memories with a new one coming into the family. They can also make the grieving process a “little” easier. I will pray for you during this process. Susan

    • Hi Kaylee, I just put my almost 15 yr old chocolate lab down about a month ago. It is the hardest thing to do, but sometimes the best thing tou can do for your beloved dog if it suffering. I would suggest getting a consult with your vet to see if there is anything else that can be done for Charlee. If not, then I would say take some time to prepare to say goodbye. Spend some extra time with him, giving all the love, hugs, kisses you can shower on him…talk to him and tell him what a good dog he has been. Good luck with your decision, it is a very difficult one.

      • Thank you so much for responding. It just hard because in the head a day face he seems fine, but his body is just not up to it anymore. Did your lab have issues with his hips before he was put down?

        • My lab was in great shape her whole life, until she injured her lower back 2 years ago. I was walking her and she darted after some ducks and when she got the the end of her leash, it snapped her to the ground and she hurt her back so badly that she was paralyzed for 3 days. We rehabbed her back and she had a really good year and then started going back downhill last year. But she did not have any hip or knee problems like many labs do. I also wonder if she might have had cancer because we found othr she had lost 20 pounds over the final year of her life…yet she ate all the time. I miss her sweet face and solemn eyes so much. She was my “only child” and the only dog I ever had. She was so special. It is hard to lose our best friends who love us so much.

    • Hi,
      If your really love your dog you’ll get him wheels to get around. I have a 105 lb German Shepherd that has degenerative myelopathy and he’s been in wheels for 1 1/2 years now. He absolutely loves it, and it has given him his life back. He runs, gets to play with other dogs, is happy and not missing a beat. I could not fathom saying goodbye when he lost his back legs. Would you want to end your life if you were not able to walk?

      • Hi “L”,

        Everyone’s situation is different. If you prefer to make mean spirited comments and broad generalizations, rather than be supportive and helpful, this might not be the right place for you!

      • I agree with Amy, to say someone doesn’t “really love” their dog because they might not be able to choose a life of wheels for them or take care of them correctly with such modifications is awful. Eveyone here loves their pet, it’s why they are here.

  4. I posted on here a couple weeks ago about my 14 year old cocker spaniel…..the sweetest girl. I was struggling with the decision to give her peace and on Dec 29th my ex-husband and I took our girl in. Even though it was peaceful and the right decision, I never imagined the guilt, pain and sadness I feel. I kept petting and kissing her until the end and after. We have a place called Paws to Angels and she met us there and offered support then again after. She took my girl placed her in a casket wrapped in a blanket and she has been cared for in such a dignified manner. I will be able to pick up her ashes and bring her home on Monday. Being such a huge animal lover, I always worry about our furry babies treatment after death. I am so grateful for this wonderful service! Rest in peace our sweet, sweet Rylie!

    • I cried everyday for the first 4 weeks after our Cocoa went to Heaven. I had terrible guilt, regret, and heartache. After the 1 month mark, I felt quite a bit better and can now think about her without the urge to cry my eyes out. RIP Rylie.

  5. I have a 13 year old Yorkie, he is almost blind and was diagnosed with a collapsed trechea last year. The meds he is on have not helped him much. He has progressivley gotten worse. I have not slept in bed with my husband for over 2 months, having to sleep on the sofa with Cooch to keep him calm at night. He also has dementia, so he paces the floor and stares into space. I know the time is close to making a decision. It is honestly the hardest decision I have ever made. I pray every night for God just to take him in his sleep. We don’t want our sweet boy suffering for our selfishness. Don’t know what to do!!!!!!

    • Jennifer, I feel your pain. I am the one that wrote about my two 15 yr old sausage dogs, brothers, litter mates. We finally got up the courage to put them both down at the same time on Monday. And, it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. In fact as soon as I dropped them at the vet, I almost turned around to go back and get them. I kept busy that day running errands, etc. Our Vet and Vet’s assistant helped us a lot in making the decision. In away I think I was looking for “permission”, that it’s ok. I knew that Chief would grieve badly as they were always together. He wasn’t in good shape either. My husband and I made the decision to do it for their sake as well as ours. We weren’t sleeping either because Coach had dementia and was doing the same thing your dog is doing. The thing that helped me the most was putting myself in their place. Would I want to live like that? I will be praying for you and your husband. Susan

      • Hi Susan, I am glad you were able to make the decision about your dogs crossing the rainbow bridge together. That was a tough one, I am sure. God Bless ya’ll.

      • Susan,
        Thank you for your incouragment. And if am so sorry you had make decision for both of your babies. I am trying to do the best for my Cooch. It is breaking my heart but, it is time to do something for him. I am just ready for him to rest. I know it has been a hard fight for him the last few weeks.


        • It’s still so fresh. I miss them not being in their favorite chair, wagging tails, sitting with me on the sofa. They would jockey for position next to me especially in the winter. So, every time I tear up and wonder if I did the right thing I just think for something funny they did and try to remember them like they were before old age got them. Hang in there!

          • I am sorry for your loss.
            Had to put my little girl down on December 22..she was my best friend and confidant. I can still see her running with her little ears back and so very happy. I completely understand what you are going through…it really sucks….but…we have to think about how much better they are…not how it makes us feel…our babies….we do what is best for them no matter how much it hurts…

  6. We have two sausage dogs, brothers, out of same litter, 15 yrs old. One of them has dementia, not too active, mostly blind and deaf. However, he never forgets it’s meal time or time for a snack. He is having some urine accidents in the house, not on a regular basis yet. He can no longer be kenneled because of the dementia so some nights he’ll come in our room and wake us up, or scratch on the door. Meds haven’t worked. We are thinking it’s time to put him down. Our dilemma is the brother. He’s in fair shape but is also mostly blind and deaf. Since they have never been apart should we put him down as well? Will he miss him brother and it cause him sadness and confusion? We’re having such a hard time with this. Has anyone else dealt with this situation, or have thoughts? Thxs, Susan

    • Oh my, so heart breaking! I am no expert, by any stretch, but I have read that dogs do not mourn death the same as humans do. Every dog is different, of course, but I wonder if the brother might have a period of sadness, and then get past it much faster than you will. I don’t know…anyone else have expertise is this situation?

      • Thanks Amy. We are really on the fence about this. If the second dog was younger with no issues of course we wouldn’t consider putting him down. They are so close. Always have to be together, sleeping, eating, going outside, etc.

        • Gosh, maybe you could do what I did and call the SPCA pet loss hotline. The doctor, a psychologist, is very nice and very willing to talk as long as you need, helping you make a decision about that. I do not have the number, but you could google it, as I did. Such a hard place to be, between a rock and a hard place, really.

      • Dogs and cats definitely grieve for their lost companions. I know this from experience after losing my terrier Max to epilepsy after a five-year struggle. The meds kept things under control most of the time, but he would sometimes have to stay at the vet overnight. The morning he didn’t come home (passed away in his sleep), our other two dogs paced and howled (I also thought they were just picking up on our distress) until we explained to them that Maxie had gone to a better place (yes, dogs can’t understand us but they sure looked like they were listening), led them to have a sniff at his bed and his blankie and then packed them away. They were both depressed for about a week (poor appetite, tails down, sniffing at the place his bed used to be, you know the symptoms) and then started to rally. Ten years later, Cody still gets excited when he sees a white terrier until the dog comes closer, then he loses interest. The same was true of our cats. Tadgie’s brother died of a heart attack, and Tadge roamed the house for months calling out in the ‘special voice’ he used to use to call Cat.

        • Oh wow, what a sad story, I am sorry for you losses! I guess it kind of confirms what I thought…that they do mourn but not the same (as long and deeply) as we do. I think they get past the loss faster than we humans do, as I am at 6 weeks after my loss and I am still a mess. Thanks for sharing your experience!

  7. Our 13 year old long-haired black lab/chow/retriever is getting distressed at night, a recently acquired behavior. Prince nuzzles me awake and I go through the list: “Do you want to go out?” We go outside. One night it was twice within 2 and a half hours. He did nothing. We came back in. Just a bit ago, it was 4a.m. & again nothing. “Oh, you want water!” Prince drinks a lot of water and his 24 oz. bowl is bone dry. Of course, it wasn’t when I went to bed at 1a.m. “Well, you don’t want food because there is still some in your bowl.” Meanwhile, Prince is doggedly clinging to me (pun intended).

    Now I cannot go back to bed. So I lay in my recliner and google “13 yr old dog acting senile,” & I eventually click my way to this blog. As I typed, Prince wedged himself underneath a wooden tv table and between the sofa & the arm of my recliner, an unusual posture. He just stares at me with his once brown, now glazed mottled blue eyes and breathes heavily into my face. I notice, with pangs of guilt, how bad his teeth are, although none appear missing. I look upon his shabby, dull coat where endless tufts of hair are begging to be gently tugged away. Even though his coat sheds enough to blacken our beige carpet & even though one brushing yields enough fur to stuff a couple of plastic grocery bags, his unkempt coat remains an unfinished task, mainly because he is in much discomfort no matter how delicately I brush & he lets me know in no uncertain manner, growling, baring his teeth, & even snapping.

    He has had hip dysplasia since we got him when he was 18 weeks old. And I don’t recall when, but fairly early on, he acquired a growth on his side. I thought it to be a tumor, but the vet said it’s common, benign, & I’m just to make sure it never gets punctured! Although that growth remains the largest, Prince now has several smaller versions all over. I don’t know if they cause him pain. Moreover, he has hot spots on both of his rear paws. They are constantly festering, but the vet says there is not a whole lot more to be done about them. So he hobbles about & at times his hind quarters collapse between his hip dysplasia and very painful ankles and paws.

    I think about Prince’s aging process. He is often listless & yet still does respond to normal commands, or inquiries (e.g. You want to go out? You want some food? Would you like some cheese?) He manages to wag his tail when another family member comes walking through the door. Much of his care is taking its toll on me, but that is because I am disabled with my own chronic pain issues. Personal inconvenience is not an acceptable reason for putting him down. I must trust I will know when the time is right for Prince.

    • Hi Christina,

      I can very much relate to what you a going through with Prince. My 15 yr old lab also showed signs of cognitive decline/disease. She would sleep all day and then be restless during the night, as if she had her days and nights mixed up. She would sometimes go out in the middle of the night and not go potty but just stand there and stare into the darkness. As she ages, she preferred close and tight spaces. She would squeeze under furniture, as if she felt safer there. She also would soe,times “get lost” in the corner of a room, or go to the wrong side of the door to go out.

      It is so hard to see them go downhill. We too tried everything we could…meds, laser therapy, specially cooked meals, etc. it would all work at first but then she would slip down a little further.

      Towards the end, I was so confused about what to do about Cocoa’s condition. I ended up calling a “Pet Loss Hotline” at the SPCA. I spoke at length with a psychologist. It helped me a lot, I would recommend it.

      I feel for you, putting my sweet baby down was the hardest and most gut wrenching thing I have ever experienced.

      I hope you find peace.

  8. It seems to me that even though putting my dog to sleep will be heart breaking for me, it in the end will show her how much she was really loved, said Cindy in November….and I believe it is true. That’s sacrificial love – it hurts more than anything, but it may be the most compassionate thing we can do for our beloved dogs.

    • I put my bevoved Lucy to sleep today….She was an almost 9 year old
      Shep/huskey rescue who was the love of my life.after almost 10 months
      Of seeing her slipping away bit by bit with sevier arthritis in her back
      Legs….I made the hardest destion I ever made in my life. I couldn’t
      Stand to see her loose a bit more of her Lucyness every week. We tried
      Everything….. Drugs that gave her kidney levels
      Unacceptably high numbers, antibiotics to combat that, pain meds etc.
      She kept getting worse… I had to drag her to walk, feed her by hand and carry her up and down 3 flights of stares…hold her up in front of her water bowel….although I’ve had 3 dogs prior to Lucy…I never had to make a choice Like I made today… All my other babies died on their own. I’ve been prepareing for this day for a while now and as I write this I still can’t beleve she’s no longer here. All of the things she loved no longer meant anything to her anymore…I know in my heart I did the right thing…but my heart is so broken.

      • Hi Billy Bell,

        I am so sorry about Lucy, my heart breaks for you. The first month (give or take) after they are gone is so hard. My baby Cocoa has been gone just under a month and I still cry almost every day for her. I miss her sweet face so much.
        We too tried everything for our dog, meds, laser therapy, home cooked food, etc. it all helped for a period of time, and then she would slip down a little further.
        All I can say is just allow yourself to fully grieve and know that feelings of regret and guilt are normal, but those negative feelings will soften and you will be left with good memories.
        Cocoa was my only dog ever. I think that means she will always be the most special to me, but I do want another one soon.
        I hope you have some emotional support. I do still talk to my dog all the time and look at her pictures every day. I also have her ashes and a paw print that I hold dear.
        Hang in there, and come back to this blog Andy rite a outd our feelings whenever you need to. I will always respond! It helps so much!

      • I am about to put my little dog…Lucy… to sleep tomorrow morning.

        She has been my “rock” through my parents dying…a bad relationship…and just “in general” been an always happy and positive part of my day.

        She is diabetic & blind…but that never kept her from being a “dog”….wish I had her courage and out look on life. Now she is in renal failure…not even close to the dog I knew…can’t let her suffer any longer. Going to miss her bunches.

        • Oh Mike, I am so sorry you are having to put Lucy down at Christmas. It sounds like you are not conflicted though, so that is much better than not really knowing if it is the right time or not. It is very hard to do either way. I hope you find peace and have people around you that are understanding and know what a difficult time this is for you. Godspeed Lucy.

        • Thank you for your reply above. Yes, you are right. We have to do what’s best for them not us. Do you plan to get another dog?

          • I don’t know….as much as I enjoy the company…fun…companionship…someone to talk to…that doesn’t talk back.. ;)…gonna be hard to replace Lucy…plus…it is just me.
            You going to?

          • Not now. My husband and I are retired and have begun to travel some. Maybe in a few years when our traveling days are over.

  9. Dear SaraLyn,

    I’m sorry you’re going through this with your beloved dog, and I hope this weekend is going better than you expected. It’s so difficult to know if our dogs are in pain, and if putting them to sleep is the right thing…I have a little Bichon, too. They’re so amazing, I love my dog so much!

    With great love comes great sacrifice. I know this is easier to say than do, but I believe we need to protect our beloved creatures from pain. I truly believe that dogs really do “rest in peace” after they are put to sleep, and that it is up to us to put our pain and grief aside. We need to do what’s best for our dogs no matter how it makes us feel.

    I wish you all the best as you make this decision, and prepare to let Miss Bebe go. Maybe she took a turn for the better and doesn’t have to say good-bye yet….but I pray for peace and healthy grieving when her time comes.

    In sympathy,

    • Hi, my Staffie, Toby, is now between 12 & 13 years old (we rescued him back in 2004 so are not sure!). For the past year or so he has been suffering with arthiritis in both his back legs. Consequently his walks became much shorter than he would like, but he still appeared a happy dog. Earlier this year he jumped down the stairs to greet the postman and damaged his front right leg, he has been on meds (Cortisone Steroids) ever since but the leg won’t heal. So he hasn’t had a walk for 3 months now. This morning he vomited blood and some strange ‘kidney like’ substance. The vet wants to see him and I have booked an appointment for this evening; but I feel in my heart of hearts that it is now time to let him go, I’ve been thinking about it for a month. The problem is that I can’t stop crying when I think of it and I just don’t know if I can do this and can’t see how I will ever get over it. He has been my faithful companion through thick and thin and no other dog could ever replace him or his character. I guess I am looking for some reassurance that this is the right thing to do. I know everyone has to go through this at some point, but I just can’t seem to find the courage. :-(

      • I feel for you. My dog Raffles is 14, he had arthritis and had pulled all the hair out of his legs andd is now working on his back. He is blind, almost deaf, has a heart condition,which has been controlled with medication for years. I lost my husband last year so letting go of Raffles is hard. He still misses his dad and has changed over the last year. The only thing he still enjoys is eating. He eats like a horse but nothing else pleases him. No walks, no toys. I know I should do something but can’t make a decision. My vet isn’t very helpful actually. Last week I spent $225 on medications. Wish there were an easy answer.

        • Hi Joy,

          I found this site because my husband and I put our beloved (nearly 15 year old) chocolate lab down 3 weeks ago today and I still cry everyday about it.

          I too was tormented about wether it was time or not to put Cocoa down. She too had severe arthritis in her hind legs, she had a spinal injury, was almost completely deaf, and her eyes wee cloudy. She had recurrent and chronic colitis. Like Raffles, the only thing that still brought her joy was eating. She even quit drinking water from her bowl for 2 weeks, but she always wanted to eat…all day long if it was up to her. Toward the end, she slept much of the day, but she would wake up like clockwork to eat!

          If she had stopped eating, it would have been so much easier to know it was truly time to let her go. But no, she always wanted to eat!

          I prayed to God to give me a sign that it was time. That night, Cocoa soiled her bed over and over for hours. We would get her and the bed all cleaned up, fall back to sleep, and she would have another accident in her bed, and the worst part was that she didn’t even know she was doing it. Then, she got out of bed and was shaking in pain. I was terrified that we had waited too long, and it was a very bad feeling.

          The next day we called the vet and made an appt to euthanize her that day late afternoon.

          We did everything fun we could think of for her that day. We fed her all kinds of food she loved, but never got to eat due to her colitis….peanut butter crackers, whipped cream from the can, and grilled steak. She was so excited and happy that she didn’t even take a nap that day, which was totally out of the ordinary for her.

          It was still the hardest thing I have ever done, and I will be honest, part of me regrets it. Part of me wishes I had called it off. I am tormented by a few things that happened during the euthanasia, and I hope in time those feelings will lessen.

          Bottom line, it is so hard! Only you and your dog can be the judge of when it is time, and even then it is still so hard! When the time comes, please make sure you find a compassionate and caring vet, if you feel yours is not.

        • Hi Joy, I’m so sorry to hear about Raffles, I hope in some way my reply can help. At 1AM last Saturday morning, not long after my post, I was put in a position where I had to find the courage afterall. Toby had vomited blood for the second time and I knew that this was it and without further ado I called the vet and gave the order. While I was on the phone with him the line suddenly went dead, and do you know what, I thought he had put the phone down (because of the hour), at that moment I was wrought – I had a very sick dog on my hands for the night and no way to deal with him. Thankfully the vet called back and was persuaded to come out, fortunately we live quite close to the practice. I find it too painful to go trough the whole process at the moment, but took solace in that it went smoothly (sorry to hear of you experience Amy) and was completely humane, not sudden and he died in my arms with all my love. There are a couple of images afterwards that I can’t get out of my mind, but as Amy says time will help. Joy, you will definitely know in your heart of hearts when it’s time to make the decision, because somehow and in some way you will look at Raffles and know, the both of you (I believe). It’s such a shame that after so many years of joy shared things have to end like this. I am happy that Toby is freed, it is our feelings of loss that is devastating and I think we all have to understand this in order to begin grieving. I’ve had some lovely messages of support from friends which has also helped… so try and talk if you can bear to. x

          • I am so sorry you had to go through that trauma with Toby. That type of thing seems to always happen in the middle of the night, when it seems even more scary and desperate.

            It hurts your heart deeply.

            I feel for you.

            I hope you are able to fully grieve and then find peace.

          • Thank you Amy, and my best wishes to you.

  10. I am really glad to find this blog. My precious Bichon, Miss Bebe has been with me for 13 years. I adopted her when she was 2. She turned 15 in September. We moved to Australia in 2002 and moved back in 2004. She has never been sick all these years until 3 weeks ago. She was so excited when I came home from work one day and dropped to the floor with a seizure. I scooped her up and rushed her to the Vet. After blood work etc, all was fine. No worries. The next morning, she was so excited when I got up and she basically fainted melting to the floor. I scooped up up again and to the vet. They kept her for the day. Still nothing. Got her home and she was excited again, and fainted melting to floor. Back to the vet as it was their late clinic. They started her meds. 2 days later her breathing was abnormal. After xrays ect..congestive heart failure, bladder stone. More meds. She started feeling like her ol self. She only had one more fainting spell and she was fine 15 min later. As of tues, she is unable to maintain her balance and not eating, only drinking water. Dropped her off at the vet’s in hopes of good news soon. I decided to go the the vet’s office to check in. After the news, I felt like dying. I could not breathe. Her liver and kidney’s are failing. I pulled a mattress in the living room near her spot so I can be beside her. Thank God I have an amazing staff to give me this time to be with my sweet girl. I know I need to make the decision as she now cannot hold her balance as she tries to get up and I help her. She urinates and then I place her back in her bed. I do not want her to suffer what so ever. Is it time? By reading the questions above, I know it is time. She just drank lots of water as I gave her…in a syringe nausea meds. I just need to know if she is in any pain at this moment. She is not on any meds as I want the weekend to fully make the decision. Help!!

  11. I’m so glad I found this! I am meeting with my vet in the morning to discuss my 14 yr old Cocker Spaniel Rylie. She is amazing….has never been aggressive or bit anyone and has always been happy and so fun. The last couple years have been tough and she has been battling a chronic ear infection that just won’t go away. It is pseudomonas and is resistant to many drugs. Making matters worse is the large tumor just in the ear canal opening so it’s difficult getting her drops down inside and the tumor can’t be removed. She has horrible arthritis in her back and hind legs and is on prednisone for her ear and the joints. Even with that she struggles to get up. She misses a stair occasionally or a back leg gives out.
    A couple weeks ago she went through a wild puppy stage for about a week that had my kids and myself in shock. She chased squirrels and ran…..she hasn’t done that in years. She was playful and alert. It didn’t last and I wonder if it was a sign. Something she did for us. When my ex-husband would come over she would cry and shake with excitement and you couldn’t help but smile. Now she doesn’t even get up, but wags her little tail. She still eats… fact that is kind of her obsession and we say if she had thumbs the rest of the world would go hungry! :). No decreased appetite, but I don’t think that is a factor with her. She sleeps, and when awake begs for food then sleeps. That is her life…..she won’t go for walks and I let her go outside in front but she just potties and right back to the door. Years ago if she got out we would be chasing her down the street and only way she would stop is if you said TREAT! So, is it time? She has never shown pain even the vet doesn’t understand it. Her eyes lost that glow…..she is now popping up skin tumors like crazy and losing patches of hair. I feel it’s time, I constantly cry, I know in my heart. I have an 11 yr old Pom that is acting sullen….he blocks the doggie door like he doesn’t want her going outside. He has luxating patellar, torn ACL in both back legs. He can no longer go up the stairs so he barks and we have to carry him. He has allergies does the reverse sneeze a lot, and a collapsing trachea. I can’t see them apart and with his ailments…..I am mortified to admit I have had thoughts of letting them go to Rainbow Bridge together. I’m making myself cry just writing about having that thought and it makes me feel like a bad mommy. I love animals and tried to save an opossum after it got hit by a car…..I am so sad and depressed I just don’t know what to do.

    Thank you to anyone who reads this LONG STORY! I already feel like my baby is gone :(

    • My heart truly hurts for you as I know you, like probably the majority of the rest of us, landed on this blog in a moment of desperation seeking for answers to a question that you already know….. We just somehow want someone to tell us YES. THIS is the right time and this is the right decision. It completely sucks that though everyone offers support, no one can tell us anything that will make the decision easier. I posted on here a few weeks ago…. for the same reason. My Boston Terrier had been diagnosed with a brain tumor, her quality of life had dropped drastically (though I will say in hindsight now that she is gone, and my memories of her are returning to the fullest happiest times, I had apparently blocked out how badly she had gotten). She was basically not functioning, and then, I too got one more magical day with my dog. She ran up and down the stairs to potty that day, jumped and cuddled on the couch, licked my tears. She gave me I think 1 more good day….. so I would know it was ok. The next day, she was back to her “sick” self…. and the vet came and freed her of that stupid body so she could once again run and be free.

      I, too, feel like I mourned her loss for a LONG time before we actually let her go. The week before I made the decision was pure hell and agony. I don’t regret what I did for her…. I feel it was the last kind act I could offer a best friend who had helped me through so much in life. She couldn’t make that decision for herself…. worst part of being a dog owner.

      May you find peace…… I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. And though “time heals all wounds” is so cliché….. it will be 3 weeks this Friday….. I think of her ALL OF THE TIME….. but more and more I am able to think of her and smile and not think of her and cry. That’s progress. That’s something.


      • Thank you so much! The support helps the guilt feeling ease up a little. I also talked to my sister who is the level headed one, who has been preparing me for this and I sensed her relief when I admitted it felt like the time. I also told her of my unsettling thought of putting my 11 yr old Pom down at the same time. He isn’t as bad, but he isn’t in great shape. I was waiting to hear no it’s not his time…..instead she said given his health she thinks it is a good idea to let them go together. My Ex had initially thought that too, but I just dismissed it. I’m labeling myself a dog killer in my head, maybe because having to make the final decision is more than I can handle. I wish someone would just say yes it is time for Rylie and Blackjack. Why is this so damn hard?

        • Michelle, have you been abLe to make any decisions yet? Today is 3 weeks from when we put our sweet Cocoa down. Just wondering how things are for you all?

          • I saw my vet and he said I’m up against a wall as far as her ear goes. It will not get any better. He seemed a little surprised when I brought up end of life though. He said all her labs were good and no indication of kidney/liver problems. The hair falling out is a skin infection and she is on meds and a special shampoo which is helping. He said it was my decision and nobody wants her to suffer though. He mentioned the ear and how some dogs will do the head tilt when their in pain, Rylie doesn’t do that. I know the time is soon but we are going to take it week by week.

          • I think that is a good approach, take it week by week. My dog had the skin infection too and lost her hair in patches. I used a medicated shampoo and a round of antibiotics and it went away and her hair grew back.

    • I cried reading this because I am in the same position. My 10yr old westie has chronic pseudomonas infections in both ears she too has a tumour in her ear and another one appeared this week on the tip of her ear her ear looks so sore it must be so uncomfortable for her yet she is still the sweet natured dog she has always been she too has a good apetite but no longer enjoys going out she sleeps and eats but has lost that spark she used to have I am heart broken at the prospect of saying good bye so is my 18 yr old son who I bought her for as a puppy when he was 8 seeing his tears is unbearable but is keeping her alive more about us and our heart ache I need to do the right thing for her but I am so torn

      • I feel so torn as well and being the holiday season, it’s even harder. My husband went out the morning and bought a crib mattress to make him feel better since he can’t get on bed any longer to hard on him. And he growls when lifted obviously due to diabetic nerve pain.

      • Took Mindy back to the vets this morning he is adament every thing that could be done has been done it is noe time to let her go so the decision has been made for me I don’t want her to suffer he had let me bring her home for a couple of days so my son can say good buy to her my heart is breaking as I write this but I have to put her welfare first love you Mindy you have given us so much love and joy little one we will never forget you xxx

        • I’m so sorry. It is so hard to say goodbye. We put our beloved Cocoa down 3 weeks ago today, and I still cry everyday for her. I think we love dogs so much because they never hurt our feelings like people do…they just love us and are so cute and needy…unlike kids who get more and more independent as they age…dogs need us more as they age, so we get even closer to them, as we care for them in the most intimate ways.

  12. We have a 14 year old puppy that has been struggling with Pancreatic Cancer for about two years. She has doubled her weight since being diagnosed. We’ve had emergent care bills close to two thousand dollars as we learned that she needed to be fed almost every four hours or she will have convulsions and other fun stuff.
    She is now coughing and hacking up what I can guess is phlegm. She pants fast and heavily as she walks, stands pretty much all the time yet she hardly breathes when she lays down. All of this is mixed with bouts of hacking/coughing regardless of her being upright or not.
    Does she still enjoy us giving her attention and petting her? Sure. However, as she struggles to go up and down the stairs to either the yard or as she follows me around the house…I can’t help but wonder when is it enough? I keep expecting to wake up to a dead dog but she’s like the energizer doggy who doesn’t stop.
    I have been reluctant to talk to my vet because I’m not sure how to approach them…will a vet put down a pet just on the say so of the owner? Is heavy, loud panting and coughing up phlegm a good enough reason to say this to a Vet?

    • Mary,

      I read your post and wanted to reply. I am facing putting my dog to sleep soon. He is 16 and has an aggressive cancer. I don’t want to wait until he is suffering. He and I have had 16 good years together. I have been reading about symptoms of pain and the heavy, loud panting is a symptom that your dog is in pain. You should talk to your veterinarian. I am sure he or she will be very receptive. I think many people wait too long and vets find it hard to tell people that. Putting your dog to sleep does not mean that you don’t value or love her. You do it to prevent suffering.

      I wish you strength and peace through this process.

  13. I am considering putting my 11 year old lab/shepard down. We have had Tammy since she was 3 months old.
    She has battled allergies for at least the last 9 years. The allergies have made er chew herself raw, which in turn caused skin infections, and made her smell really bad. We tried injections and pills for the allergies, they worked for a short time. Lately she has been losing control of her bowel and bladder, and she struggles to stand up and walk. The problem is in her back legs, which was why we quit doing the injections. One of the side effects to the depo injections was muscle weakness. She wanders all the time, almost as if she is lost. I hate the thought of putting her down, but surely it is an act of kindness. Tammy is not the sharpest tool in the shed. However she is very loving, and loyal to a fault. Even now with all her health issues, she would lay her life down for mine. It seems to me that even though it will be heart breaking for me, it in the end will show her how much she was really loved.

  14. I have to make the toughest decision to put my beautiful 9.5yr Dobbie, Precious, down yesterday. Found a tumor growth in her back tit and decided to get it remove last month. After the biopsy, found that the growth is malignant and it has gone into the lymph nodes. She was back to her usual self for 2 weeks but last week, things got worse cos lumps were growing on her belly and her limp on her front left leg got worse with a big lump and the whole leg was swollen. She started to lose her appetite and was very thirsty. She wasn’t even going to the bathroom, all she does is lay there. It hurts to see her in pain and I have to make the tough call to put her to sleep. It was devastating since she was with me since a pup and we got her after we put the last Dobbie down due to bone cancer. She has been through so much with me, the birth of my daughter, my divorce and moving to our very own place, losing my job….my daughter and I miss her so dearly. I still feel I can do more or shouldn’t have got the tumor removed in the first place, still can’t believe she’s gone.

  15. Dear Michelle,

    Thank you for being here. I don’t know any affordable ways to put a dog down…but if it was me, I’d tell my veterinarian that I can’t afford it. I’d ask if they can donate the euthanasia and cremation. Some veterinarians are willing to help out by donating their time and supplies.

    I wish you all the best in this, I hope you find a solution that works.


  16. I am so sorry for your loss. Life without our dogs almost seems unbearable, because they are so much a part of our daily routines. I have two dogs, and this article on putting a dog to sleep always reminds me how precious they are and how short life is.

    May your broken hearts heal. May you find comfort in the idea that your dogs are resting in peace, and watching you with love and compassion. Your dog doesn’t want your memories to be full of pain or regret! Your dog wants you to be happy in your life, full of energy and love. My prayer is that the grief you feel will pass naturally and even quickly, and that you are able to open your heart and home to another dog in the future – a dog who needs to be rescued, and who will be eternally grateful for your presence. Just like your old dog was, and is.

    Blessings and sympathies,

  17. A very sad day today that I had to let me special baby girl go. She has suffered from Cushings disease, arthritis, thyroid and collapsed wrists. I had not concern about the money for her healthcare but her quality of life was impacted.

    Over the last few weeks she has been struggling to walk and she fell off the deck into a plant pot. I could tell she was not comfortable and struggling to get our coordination in check.

    This morning she had a seizure and it was without doubt one of the most awful experiences to watch someone you love go through such misery. It appears she may have had a few whilst we didn’t see her which must have been awful for the poor girl.

    I took her to the vet immediately after witnessing the seizure and the Vet ran some blood test and compared to a couple of weeks ago. She said from her opinion Tasha was heading for renal failure and anything we do now would be for sustaining for weeks not months and she may suffer during this time.

    In tears I had to make the call, it was time to let my baby go. I held her as she passed and I was happy it was so peaceful and quick. I am now going through the grieving process and obvious guilt on whether I made the right decision or not….it’s too late anyway as she is gone and at rest.

    It is the hardest decision I have ever made in my life but I need to believe as sad as life is without her, it was the right decision for her….not me.

  18. My dear, sweet baby Rennie is an 11 year old Boston Terrier. She had her first seizure in February and they were contolled by potassium bromide unitl last week. She had 4 seizures this weekend and ended up at the hospital for a pheno injection since 3 were within 24 hours. She has a brain tumor.

    Her anxiety is worsening…. she paces in circles confused a lot…. for the last 24 hours she has had no bladder control…. but the vet gave her some prednisone and said we’d know within 3 days if it would help or not. I’m sitting here looking at her as I type this with tears just flowing down my face. I already know what I need to do for her…. I just don’t know if I do it today or if I can delay it a week. My heart is hurting so badly and I just want some peace….. for me and for her…..

    • I let her go yesterday. She went in my lap. Life hurts now for me without her. I know she is better….. I am not.

      • Mercedes,

        I am so sorry.

        I too had to make that very difficult decision about a week after you did. Hardest thing ever. I still cry every day. I miss her sweet face. I feel guilt & some regret.

        How are you feeling about your loss these days?

        • Hi Amy. Thanks for reaching out. It has now been a month without my baby…. and though I feel it’s easier at times ( I am able to remember her with smiles instead of tears occasionally), I miss her so much still. I do not regret our decision, but it doesn’t make the fact that she is gone any easier. I hope you are finding peace and comfort…. I know how hard that is. Every first without her hurts…. just as every first with her was joyous…. “… what we have enjoyed, we can never lose… all that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” ~ Helen Keller

          • I am amazed at how folks of all backgrounds feel the same sense of sadness and loss about their dogs dying. I always thought I loved Cocoa so much because I never was able to have kids, and she is my first and only dog…my only child so to speak. Well, I have learned that even those with human kids, those that have had or still do have other dogs, also feel the same sense of loss. That makes me feel better in a way…my feelings are universal.
            I wish you peace.

          • Mercedes,
            Yesterday I put down our dog Tammy. It was one of the most difficult things I had to do. I got Tammy for my husband the week before Christmas 2003. Here I was almost exactly 11 years later letting her go. I cried as I made the decision, and I cried as I held her sweet face, and watched the light leave her eyes. I brought her home, and buried her. While I knew she was gone, it hit me hard this morning. I was getting ready to leave the house this morning, and her face was not there to greet me, so that I could put her outside. I guess that’s when I really felt my heart break. She was a loyal and loving family member for 11 years. I did what was the best thing for her, even though it hurt me and my husband so much. I know with time it will get easier, and it will for you too. Just remember you did what you had to, out of love for your furry child.

          • Oh Cindy, I know exactly what you mean. It has been over three weeks for us, but I still “look” for Cocoa every time I come home…I do miss her sweet face and the energy her spirit gave me and our household.
            I look at her pictures and talk to her still. I say “I have a 70 pound hole in my heart and it hurts so much”
            I feel for you, I know the pain. You are not alone!

          • I am so sorry Tammy… your hurt and sadness now is really raw I’m sure… like I said…. every first without our fur baby’s will now cause pause, and often times tears. Thank you for your words… I know I did right by her… I just miss her so much and trying to figure out a new normal without her sucks. And Amy you are so right…. this is one of those things that unites us all…. maybe one last loving act from our pooches…. a gentle reminder that people can be compassionatecompassionate and can try to understand if we let them. Love and light to you both.

          • UGH I’m so sorry…. that’s what I get for posting on my phone… I meant to say *I am so sorry Cindy for your Tammy*…. No more phone comments from me!

  19. Im ready.. Im tired of the suffering.. I have 11 yr old Chihuahua, who is 1/ blind…
    I hear him wine daily.. he keeps me up at night wining..

    I keep getting we will call you from the vet… every time I suggest putting him down..

    For the past week my poor chihuahua has been unable to walk,.. the pain meds dont seem to be working.. blood work was fine but Kidney test came back high.. they say he injured his shoulder or back up by shoulder blade, he just keeps tucking his legs under wont even try and stand.. I have to hold him up to potty.. or he lays in his pee and i have to bathe him after wards..
    Being a single parent only part time working I couldnt afford the x ray and they refused to Bill me.. I spent $200 last week on blood work, a capstar for 5 fleas, and that was it other than a nights stay at the vet, with a emergency visit and still no results.. They think he will come out of it.. and get better..

    I cant take hearing him whining anymore.. I feel its time to put him down.. hes my youngest sons first friend and pet, I got him 6 months after my son was born.. its going to be heard on all of us..

    • Hi Jenny,

      Your words hit me hard and so very close to my heart as I read your post I had a chichuaua named Posey and had to help her across the Rainbow Bridge this past Oct. 3. Posey had similar conditions. Her kidneys weren’t working properly, I too had to help her stand at times to potty. She paced the floor and walked back and forth from the house to the shed and would fall at times. She would fall on the house floors or get stuck in a corner and not know how to get out. Posey was weak in her hind legs from the phenobarbital she had to take because of multiple seizures she had on two occasions. She had a breathing problem also. I too took her to the emergency vet twice.

      After the last visit to the vet before she had seizures, she started whining in the vets office. Posey never whined before. She too whined at night and wanted out of bed to pace the floors while I needed sleep because I work full-time. I was up 4-5 times a night comforting her and I came home at lunch to check on her.

      Posey was Mommas dog she brought home at six weeks old. Momma passed June 30, 2013 after Daddy Oct 13, 2012, then Sally, Mommas pug passed Oct. 22, 2013. Now with Posey gone, I feel very alone and lost. I have cried at least once if not more daily almost since Posey left.

      They say helping you pet across the Rainbow Bridge is the last act of love you can give. It was the hardest thing I ever did but I had too-for Posey she was 12 yrs. Old.

      Please feel free to write me at my email anytime. You and your family are in my
      prayers. Paul

      • Hi Paul,

        I am so sorry for your loss. I know how you feel. I had to let my sweet 15 yr old lab go 3 weeks ago and I too cry every day. I look at her photos and miss her sweet face every day.

        How are you coping these days?

  20. I have a 9 year old Jack Russell, Sammy he is diabetic which has recently caused his sight to go due to cataract, he has constant ear infections due to polips in his ear he is now deaf in that ear. He has just started limping Vet says could be because of ear infection. My husband and I had decided 2 years ago when he was diagnosed with diabetes, we would go by quality of life. Obviously it’s time. But now we’re stuck in another situation I recently got let go from my job in July, still unemployed seeking full time work. Husband contractor business is slow but we keep roof over our heads and insulin for Sammy. We want to put him down and have him cremated. We obviously can’t afford this. Hoping by posting my story someone will know an affordable way to put our sweet pup down.

  21. Dear June,

    You love your dog so much, it’s almost impossible to think about putting him to sleep! The loss is heartbreaking, and it seems like you’ll never get over it. It’s very sad, and such a difficult thing to do.

    But, I think your first concern needs to be for your dog. Not on keeping him alive, but letting him go so he doesn’t suffer anymore. Is it fair to him to stay alive if he’s in pain, and not enjoying a good life anymore?

    My prayer is that you find the strength you need to let him go. This is sacrificial love — it’s about putting your dogs’ needs before yours. This is a final act of love, to put him down and let him rest in peace. It will be painful for you, but I hope you find comfort in the knowledge that you loved him enough to put his needs before yours. I know it’s painful, but I believe there is a time that we need to let our dogs go. It breaks my heart to think of life without my dogs….but I feel sick at the thought of them living in pain.

    Let me know how things go, if you decide to put your dog to sleep :-(

    With deepest sympathy,

  22. Dear Anita,

    Thank you for being here, I know how difficult it is to put a dog to sleep when you love her so much. It may feel like it’s heartless to say good-bye, but it’s not.

    Putting your dog to sleep when she is sick and not enjoying life anymore is the most caring, loving thing you can do. It is an act of sacrificial love, of kindness and compassion. If you’re keeping her alive when she is in pain or not enjoying life, then I believe you are doing her a disservice. You might be keeping her alive for your own sake, not for hers.

    I don’t know how you can be absolutely 100% sure….but what makes me think it might be time to let her go is that you said your dog isn’t enjoying her life. I believe you’ve answered your own question, but you don’t want to put her down because of the grief you’ll feel.

    And indeed, you will be so sad at your loss. But, you will know she isn’t suffering anymore. I hope that knowledge – that she will be resting in peace in a safe, secure place – helps you make the decision a little easier and eases your pain.

    In sympathy,

    • Hi I don’t know what to do about putting my dog to sleep, he is a 10 year old german Shepard his back legs have been bad for a while now but over the last few days they had been times where he hasn’t been able to pick him self up, he has been threw so much all his life when he was 5 wks he managed to scoff a large bowl of complete dog food his mothers food, he had to have a major operation then at the time the vets rang me asked if I woulx give them my permission to put him to sleep because he swallowed mucas threw the operation had Got a bad case of humonia and they said he wouldn’t make it threw the night, but I said no and at the time it was Xmas I said to the vet no it’s xmas miricals happen I will not give you my permission to put him to sleep. 10 years later I still have him he is bad now with his back end but vets have gave me pai. Killers for him hoping he will get threw to the end of next week, I are finding it so hard to come to terms with letting my baby go i also still have his mother she is fit and healthy will she sense that he’d son has gone has to this day she cleans his face every morning and every night. Do you think I will lose hey soon after of heart hake, I can not cope I would rather it be me then my baby’s.

  23. Hello my little dog is 18 ryes old
    She no longer enjoys her life .
    My problem is trying to decipher
    If it it’s time to let her go .
    She seems to have all the problems that an older dog goes throught.
    I don’t want to seem heartless .but how can I be absolutely shure .
    Any advise to help thanks

  24. Dear Margaret,

    Trust that you made the right decision. You were listening to your heart and mind, and you believed that it was time to put your dog to sleep. You did what you thought was right for your 16 year old dog, and you have to trust that it was time for her to go.

    You saw that she was in pain and struggling, so you saved her from more painful moments in the future. How can this be the wrong decision? You decide to put your dog to sleep because you loved her so much, and you wanted her to be free from her old, sore, achy body. I believe you made the right decision, and my prayer for you is that you find peace and healing.

    Your beloved dog is watching you with love and a free spirit, and does not want you to suffer. She wants you to be happy and peaceful, and secure in the knowledge that she forgives you and is very glad you let her go.


  25. Thank you for this post. My wife and I have been debating putting our dog to sleep for a few weeks now, and it really has been tough on the whole family. Our dog was a very big part of our family, and it’s going to be really hard to say goodbye.

  26. Andrew,

    It’s such a difficult decision to make – and what might make me decide to put my dog down may be very different than what might make you decide. Above all, we need to be at peace with our decision.

    Your boy is young, only six years old. But age isn’t the most important factor – it’s his quality of life. A dog can be 15 years old and enjoying a great life, or one year old and suffering. If you believe that your dog is still enjoying a good quality of life, then maybe it’s not time to put him to sleep. But if you believe “a good life” is more than sitting at home….then maybe it’s time to let him go.

    What do you think your Bernese mountain dog would tell you to do? Is he ready to go? Dogs don’t fear death the way humans do…it’s possible that he’s ready, but you aren’t.

    I’m sorry there aren’t any easy answers, and I wish you all the best in this decision.


  27. Dear Gillian,

    How is your Pomeranian today? Does she still seem to be scared, and in pain?

    I think the biggest question is whether or not she’s ready to leave this world. You know her better than anyone…when you sit with her and put your hands gently on her body, do you get any sense of what she wants from her life? I know this is difficult to know for certain, but I believe our dogs aren’t afraid of death. They’re scared of lots of things on this earth and they don’t necessarily want to die….but they know death is as natural as being born.

    If my dogs were in pain and not enjoying an active life, I would let them go. I wouldn’t give them pain medication, because I’d have no idea how effective it was. I know it’s easier to say this when it’s not my dogs who are suffering, but I really believe I’d choose to let them rest in peace rather than try to prolong their lives.

    Only you can make this decision…and you need to be at peace with putting your dog to sleep. My prayer for you is that you find the strength, courage, and love you need to make the most sacrificial decision of all.

    In sympathy,

  28. It seems like everyone feels exactly the same way when it comes to this decision. My boy is only 6 years old. He is a bernese mountain dog. Has hip diplasia and austio arthritus (i think the arthritus comes with the hips). Also he has decided that any piece of fabiric in the house is his to eat. Which in turn is really messing with his digestive system leading to accidents in the house. I do not know what to do because he can only walk for about 5 minutes and then he is in pain all night. I feel terrible that he can no longer go out and about but at the same time he does not seem “unhappy” sitting at home. Am i being selfish keeping him at home all the time? Any advice?

  29. I am facing this decision for my ten year old basset who has suspected disc on the point of rupture, dodgy ticker and thyroid problems as well as skin issues. In the last three weeks her legs have been failing and she is no longer the cheeky, full of life character she was. Going to the toilet and eating now seem difficult for her. Reading your page had helped me make this heartbreaking but right decision and on Friday the vet will come home to put her to sleep. I will miss her more than words can say but know I have to make this decision in her best interest… She is existing not living.

    • I had to take our Yorkshire terrier on the 3rd October. She was 17 years old but her kidneys were failing. I felt guilty about letting her go. Its broken my heart, she was our life. Muffin we miss you so much you will never be forgotten xx

      • Oh Steve my heart totally breaks for you. My Yorkie, Sparky is being euthanised on Wednesday this week and I am totally and utterly distraught.
        My little man will be 16 years 8 months old and although the vet said his heart his strong and his legs don’t seem too bad, he has been totally deaf for a long time. He has cataracts and doggie dementia. He sleeps nearly all day but at night is anxious and distressed, pacing, whining & barking. At night he is doubly incontinent and walks through his urine & excrement where normally dogs would walk around it. He is sad for most of the time and is constantly hungry (due to dementia he forgets he has been fed) and seems tormented. I feel it’s not fair for my beautiful boy to go on in this way, he deserves so much better. Selfishly I want him with me forever and can’t bear the thought of life without him. The vet said his quality of life doesn’t seem too good now and that’s what has to be considered. Trying to do fun things with loads of love and treats for his last days

        • Hi Fiona. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make. But Muffin was not eating properly and she was very unsteady on her legs. All the food that she loved she wouldnt touch, except for a little cooked chicken. She was drinking less too. 17 years to have your best friend is a long long time. I look around the house for her everyday in all the little places she would snuggle into. She made our house a proper home with not having children. We miss her with all our hearts. Goodnight old lady and God bless Muffin xx

        • Hi Fiona. We lost Muffin as you know on 3rd Oct. On the 28th October we collected our new ten week old Yorkshire Terrier, Millie. We only had Millie for five days, she died this morning 3rd November at 4am. We just don’t know what’s happening in our lives at the moment and what we’ve done to deserve this. She was the most gorgeous looking Yorkie we have ever seen and so bubbly and characterful. She was settling in lovely with us, but stopped eating on Friday. I took her back to the breeder on Sunday morning and she passed away a 4am on Monday. We are absolutely devastated. She was a bundle of joy and love. R.I.P. Millie. You will never be forgotten for the joy you gave us in you very short life. Goodnight, God bless xxxxxxx

    • Today I had to make the heartbreaking decision to put my beloved cocker spaniel to sleep , his name was woody and he was 13 years old . Woody had kidney failure and had deteriorated over the past three days , he couldn’t eat or drink or go to the toilet, the saddest thing was is that he kept struggling out into the garden and laying down in the wet grass , his breathing was laboured and he was making a strange noise. We carried him back inside and laid him on his bed, woody looked so sad and his eyes said he had had enough , through tears and grief we rang the vet who came within the hour . We told woody how much we loved him , kissed him stroked and cuddled him and the vet gave him the injection, woody went to sleep instantly , no distress just heartbreak for us, I never realised it would hurt this much , it’s been 7 hours since woody died we are distraught, it’d agony How will I ever get over this ? I’ve never cried do much I just want him back .

  30. I have an 8 year old Pomeranian in CHF, with a collapsing Trachea, one back leg that had a luxating patella but repaired with pins amd recently the other has been diagnosed with the same. About 18 months ago she was diagnosed with the CHF and is being treated and we recently added tramadol for her back leg discomfort because surgery is not an option. Tonight her back leg with pins seems to have frozen up and she could barely walk. Since then she’s hiding herself in the back of her kennel which is what she usually does when she’s scared. I did give her some tramadol this evening. I’m thinking that if the back leg doesn’t resolve itself in the next few days maybe it’s time. But then I feel guilty because she isn’t doing “that” bad. However her life consists of just eating sleeping and going to the bathroom. She doesn’t play, has never liked my giving her too much affection, so that hasn’t changed. I don’t know if I’m heading to the right decision. Her vet and I did have a conversation last month that she will probably not last 6 months because of the CHF. But it’s her legs and the discomfort that’s the issue now. I can always up her meds but is it fair to dope her up so she is comatose? I’m so confused. Thanks for any input you might have.

  31. My thoughts are with you, as you think about putting your dogs to sleep. May you find peace and acceptance as you make this decision, and may the veterinarian who helps you be kind, compassionate, and supportive.

    And, may you remember that your dogs will rest in peace – without pain or fear – after they die. They will embrace death as naturally as they embraced every moment of their lives.

    In sympathy,

  32. We are thinking of having our lab mix put to sleep either monday or tuesday morning. He is 16 years old and has a myriad of problems, from skin issues, to not being able to see or hear well, and he can barely walk without staggering over into something. He has started to turn away from his food as well. I know his quality of life is poor and he sleeps most of the time, when he isn’t pacing around. I know it’s time to let him go, but I still question myself.

    • KAREN, we are in the exact same boat! Our black lab/golden mix is 17 and has a lot of the same problems you mentioned. She still eats like she always has though. Did you put your dog down? If so, do you feel it was the right decision? We are struggling. Even had an appt and cancelled. Thank you!

    • Aloha;
      I said goodbye to my loving beautiful very sick black lab retriever mix I cradled he’s head in my arms; kissed him for one last time. I could not stay to watch he’s last struggle and bleeding out; I tried in vein to stop. Scarface (we didn’t name him) came to use 10 years ago; rescued from the pound; he was 2 years old and his first family couldn’t take with them no money to fly a large dog back to mainland. I was not looking for a dog that day; he was sitting in a cage of many others afraid; too large for any family that wanted only smaller dogs. I looked at him; I asked him why couldn’t they take? He tilted he’s head and talked to me with he’s eyes. Love at first sight!
      I am hurting; crying calling he’s name thru the house today…..”Scarface come to Mommy”
      I just couldn’t do it; my Vet who has helped us many times with our other loving pets. See my husband, Tim was our strong person who did it all. I left Scarface and went home to let Tim know that he’s buddy was gone; Tim has demensia and in a wheelchair; I will have to slowly let him understand.

    • I too have a 16yr old shepherd mix, our appt is today… so very difficult to make and keep this appt as I cancelled the original appt over a month ago. But other than his good appetite, all the signs are here and clear. As one person described, my Jasper is basically existing, not living. He just sleeps most all day, paces the house at night and his potty habits are well, just not what they were in his younger days. I made this decision to put him down because I fear that he will pass alone and in pain while we are at work, and that I cannot live with that thought… we also have a 3yr old little guy I am sure will miss him too, so my plan is to honor Jasper’s lifeby remembering all the great times we had and the love and devotion he gave to us all these years. He has been a great dog and will be sadly missed. But I am doing this out of pure love!

  33. Tomorrow I’m saying goodbye to my much loved staffie Keiko. She just turned 11 last month and we’ve had her since she was weaned. In May this year she started having fits and has been on epiphen ever since. We also give her metacalm for her joint pain. Over the last month she has deteriorated quite rapidly and is displaying all the symptoms of dementia. She hasn’t gone upstairs for weeks, no longer greets us in the morning or when I come home from work, She’ll come up like she wants petted and then pulls away. She paces and pants and cries at night. In the last week she has fouled in the house just a short time after being let out which she has never done before. Oh and she licks everything..the couch, our clothes, the fridge door, the wall in the corner she gets stuck in. She eats but doesn’t have the same enjoyment and won’t play anymore. Her wee personality is gone and she doesn’t show pleasure or enthusiasm at anything. My heart is breaking but I know it’s time to let her go. Just a short 4 weeks ago she would ‘help’ me garden and play tug. She’s lying sleeping just now, snoring gently the way she does and it’s hard to think she won’t be here this time tomorrow. You would think she is fine but I know she will wake soon and the pacing and crying will start. I’m so thankful for all the joy and love she has given us. I don’t know how I’m going to say good bye, it hurts so much

    • So yesterday my son and I took Keiko to the beach for the last time on the way to the vet. She padded dutifully up and down the beach accepting the treats we gave her. The contrast between her and the other dogs, even the older ones, we met was striking. She didn’t wag her tail or greet people, it was clear she was putting up with it for our sakes. We walked through the park beside the vet, took a last picture of her and James and then went in to say goodbye.
      It was so gentle and painless, literally like she went to sleep, my heart broke again, as I saw the full extent of my son’s love for her. Our vet was an angel, so sensitive and compassionate, I’m so grateful to this wonderful professional lady.
      I had snuggled with Keiko on the couch in the early hours of the morning. She laid her head in the crook of my arm and looked into my eyes. She seemed to be crying and I kissed her and told her I was going to make it better, she licked me and dozed off while I held her and listened to her breathe..
      I thought my heart would be empty and have shed many tears however this morning as I lay in the same place on the same couch without her comforting weight, thinking of the previous morning I felt a ‘thank you’ in my heart and realised it is still full. Full of the memories and love she gave, full of the gratitude I can feel from her for keeping my promise, full of the knowledge that the precious gift of loving her could never leave the space empty. So, it still hurts but she’s entitled to the pain and I embrace it’s bitter-sweetness as proof of our love.

      • We had our 17 year old Yorkshire Terrier put to sleep on Friday 3rd October 2014. She was struggling with high kidney levels, not eating properly for nearly three weeks, wobbling when she walked and trembling a lot of times. I took her to the vets where she didn’t move off her blanket, she just lay there. I stroked her head and paws as she went to sleep. It broke my heart. I feel so guilty in letting her go. Maybe more could have been done ?. I just told the vet that I though she had given up. The hardest decision I have ever made in my life. I kissed her face and said goodbye before I broke my heart and left her. I’m having her cremated and should have her back on Friday 10th October. Goodnight God bless Muffin we will always have you in our hearts and minds. Sleep tight old lady x

  34. Thank you so much for this article as it brought me comfort. We made the very difficult decision to put our 13 year old Golden Retriever down just on Monday. It was the hardest decision and hardest week. Now I am plagued with guilt and worry we did it too soon. She was in pain. She panted most of the day and couldn’t get up off the floor without some assistance or looking so uncomfortable. It was starting to become difficult for me to even watch her because she seemed to be struggling so much at times. Yet, she still got excited to see certain people and was still eating. Last week as she was coming up the stairs to come inside her front legs gave out and she slammed her face on the stairs. That was when I decided we might be getting close. I just have horrible guilt and miss my friend so much.
    Thanks again for this article.

    • I still feel guilt and remorse that we put our Aussie mix to sleep too soon
      and that was in August. She also struggled to get up and sit down and
      sometimes fell over for no apparent reason. She was eating sporadically,
      but no enjoyment. Even though she was almost sixteen, I don’t know that
      she was ready to leave. It just broke my heart to watch her struggle. Now
      I am tormented that I should have waited.
      Thank you for this article, it helped.

  35. Dear Nicola,

    Thank you for being here – it sounds like you’ve been having a great deal of difficulty with your youngest schnauzer. It also sounds like he’s not doing well.

    Nobody can make the decision to put your dog to sleep for you…it’s something you have to decide, because you need to be at peace with your decision. If you make this decision because someone told you to, then you’d later second guess yourself, and even be angry at the person who told you it’s time to put your dog to sleep.

    I think all dog owners should look at their beloved dog’s quality of life. Is your dog happy, pain-free, and able to enjoy his life? Most of the time, we know the answer to this…it’s just that we love our dogs so much, we never want to lose them. The grief of not having them around feels overwhelming. But, we can’t keep our dogs in pain. We have to make the most difficult decision at a time they need us most. That’s sacrificial love: putting our own feelings aside, and doing what’s best for our dogs.

    Is your beloved schnauzer ready to leave this world? Lay your hands on him, take a deep calming breath, and look into his eyes and soul. Is it time for him to go? Let him decide. Remember that dogs don’t fear death; it’s as natural to them as birth. Don’t let your fear get in the way of taking good care of your dog.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you, as you make this decision.

    In sympathy,

  36. Dear Kelly,

    Thank you for being here, and for sharing how Max is doing. Deciding if you should put your dog to sleep is so difficult – and there are no easy answers.

    I think the bottom line is his quality of life. Max’s brave, strong heart could keep beating for months or another year or maybe even longer…but is he comfortable, pain free, and enjoying the things he used to? I don’t think it’s “unfair” to keep him alive because he’s not really enjoying life the way he used to.

    Is Max ready to go? Death is as natural to dogs as birth, as chasing squirrels, as eating yummy dry kibble. Humans fear death because of our grief and loss, but dogs don’t have that same dread. Sometimes we protect our dogs from death, when we should be protecting them from discomfort, pain, and a body that just isn’t up for this world anymore.

    I don’t know if it’s Max’s time to go, but I encourage you to sit with him. Take his lovely head, look into his eyes, and ask him if he’s ready to leave this world. Remember that death brings peace and the end of suffering in an aged body. I believe death is freedom and release, and it’s the final act of love — sacrificial love — that we give our dogs.

    Is Max ready to leave this world, to be free from his body?

    My prayers are with you as you make this decision. May you feel peace and serenity, even though you’ll be pierced by the grief you feel at the thought of life without your beloved dog.

    In sympathy,

    • Dear Laurie:

      Thank you so much in your kind worded response. I read these words as I grieve for Max, for I had him put to rest today at 11am. I did just as suggested, I looked deep into his cataract covered eyes and know that he was dealing with the pain and depression for my sake, which made me decide to do for him. My life will never be the same, but I am truly blessed to have had him in my life.


      • Dear Kelly,
        I am sorry for the loss of Max!
        I was in the same position as you yesterday as I had to put my golden retriever “Bubbles” to sleep at 1 pm. It was the hardest thing I have ever done and I swear a piece of my heart died with her. We spent 17 years together and were only apart for 4 weeks of those 17 years….it was an incredible journey!
        I do want to say to those that may read this note later…PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE be with your furry companion when it is time to put them to rest. They want you there until the end…it is hard to think about it, but it is the RIGHT THING TO DO!
        From Stan Rawlinson’s The 10 Commandments (from a dog’s perspective) #10: go with me on difficult journeys. Never say, “I can’t bear to watch” or “let it happen in my absence.” Everything is easier for me if you are there. Remember, regardless of what you do, I will always love you.
        Again, my sincerest apologizes on the loss of your sweet dog! I know that Max & Bubbles are running around in doggie heaven!

  37. I have three schnauzers and my baby who is 10 was diagnosed with diabetes, Cushings, high Cholestrol and high triglycerides. We are thinking about putting him to sleep because he is so lethargic and lost a lot of weight, peeing pooping and puking in the house. I am up all night with him and exhausted. What do I do?

  38. My Max is 15 1/2 yrs old. Him and I have been through a lot together and I am grateful to have had him for this long. At 11 yrs people called me crazy when I sent him for ACL surgery, stating he was too old, but to me, age wasn’t a factor..he still played, chased squirrels/bunnies and loved to run over the hill to the creek. Surgery a success, after months of recovery, Max continued his run/play times. At age 13, he had a large mass growing on his shoulder we had removed so it didn’t inhibit his ability to walk. This too was a success, mass hasn’t grown back. However, for the past yr, he has been deteriorating, mentally as well as physically. He seems confused sometimes, sleeps a lot, drinks a lot of water, is hard of hearing and sometimes his back leg will give out on him. He has some good days where he will act like a puppy when I come home, though this lasts about 30 sec. I have no doubt he has “life” left in him, but I don’t believe it is “quality life” as he no longer does the “fun things” anymore, including scratch his butt! I am trying to get the courage to call the vet and make an appointment to put him to sleep but I’m scared that I am doing this prematurely and don’t want to be unfair to him. Any opinions will be welcomed.

  39. Five days ago my dog Probie, 8 year old Amstaff Bull Terrier, was diagnosed with Inguinal Mast Cell Tumor. We started her on Kinavet at the time she was diagnosed. It is too early to tell if this drug is helping in anyway, but I am trying to be hopeful. Her initial blood test shows normal counts in every area. I’m also giving her Benadryl to help block the production of histamine and slow the tumor growth. I have also switched her diet to a low carb high fat, since most malignant cells depend on steady glucose availability in the blood for their energy and biomass.

    Probie stills has a healthy appetite, loves to play fetch with the same level of enthusiasm, and as of now does not appear to be in any discomfort.

    I have the best vet. I have been with him for 20 years – four dogs, and a cat. He has been with me through two euthanasia’s. The decision never gets easier, the signs never become any clearer. But with my previous experiences, I believe it is better to be a week too early, than one day too late.

    I am painfully aware that this cancer is terminal and I will be faced with the end of life decision. I just hope and pray I can have a little more time with her. She truly is one of God’s gifts.

  40. Dear Frankie,

    It sounds like your dog isn’t happy, and isn’t enjoying a very good or peaceful life. I believe veterinarians say that if the quality of a dog’s life is low – or if the dog is in pain or highly irritable – then it’s time to say good-bye.

    Do you think your husky is ready to leave this world? Sometimes we need to listen carefully to our dogs, for they know what the next step is. They don’t fear death like we do. Is your beloved dog telling you it’s time for her to rest in peace?

    In sympathy,

  41. I have a 13 year old husky we almost lost her once she had a infected uterus and we took care of that now she hardly wants to go outside she having accidents in the house she can’t hardly get around when she wants and she snapping at people she looks miserable half the time and she just layes around what your intake in this

  42. Thank you, Millie, for sharing your thoughts on putting a dog to sleep. We love our dogs so much, we feel terrible about ending their lives…but we don’t realize that death may bring release, freedom, and peace.


  43. Dear Terri,

    Putting your dog to sleep is not a terrible thing to do! It is a final act of love and compassion. Putting your dog to sleep means you love your dog so much you can’t bear to see him in pain anymore. Saying good-bye is a natural act of sacrificial love that shows how much you care about him. You’re willing to let him rest in peace, and not drag him through an unhappy, uncomfortable, even painful life.

    Euthanasia isn’t a punishment or failure on your part. It’s about saying good-bye with dignity and respect, before life gets unbearably difficult or painful. I believe in life after death, and that there is great peace in death. The whole “rest in peace” thing is something I really believe — even for our beloved dogs. I also believe our dogs’ spirits won’t leave us when our dogs leave this earth…and our souls will be reunited with theirs in the future.

    My prayer for you is that you accept your dog’s final days – whether it’s now or several months from now – with peace, serenity, and freedom. I pray you are able to overcome whatever feelings of guilt or anxiety you have, and find somehow healing in this transition. I also pray you hear what your dog is telling you…sometimes our dogs know what they want and what’s best for them. We sometimes just don’t have the courage to hear what they’re telling us. Sometimes they just want to be freed from the pain of this life. My prayer is that you know in your heart that whatever you decide for your dog is the best thing for both of you. Amen.

    In sympathy,

    • Hello, reading your comment has helped me with my decision, my 4 legged daughter Bella has Kidney Failure she is only 2 1/2 years old the vet says to young to have this her brother died of the same thing when he was 15 months old. I will miss her terribly, in readying other articles about this disease I came across a poem Rainbow Bridge here it is: I know I will see my baby girl again………..

      When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
      There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
      There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

      All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
      The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

      They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

      You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

      Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….

      Author unknown…

  44. Dear Iris,

    I’m so sorry for what you’ve gone through with your dog, for how traumatic and painful it was. It sounds so frightening and confusing, and your poor dog suffered. I can’t imagine how upsetting it must have been. It sounds like the veterinarian and staff weren’t caring, kind, or compassionate. They have such an important job, and when they act coldly and even cruelly, we are devastated — and helpless. I have a couple of little dogs, too, and the instinct to protect and love them is so strong. We feel like we let them down when they suffer pain, because they’re so vulnerable and dependent on us.

    I can’t offer advice, but my prayer is that you are able to let your dog’s death go. May you find a way to accept the past – for it can’t be changed. May you forgive yourself for not doing things differently, and may you forgive the veterinarian for not saving your beloved chihuahua-terrier. Acceptance and forgiveness are not easy to grasp and hold…but if you can work towards accepting and forgiving, you will find freedom from the heavy burden of grief and guilt. I pray you are able to find peace with your dog’s life and death, that you learn to remember her with love and joy. Holding on to the anger, frustration, and injustice at how your dog’s life ended won’t help anybody. In fact, it’ll just eat away at you and fill you with more pain than you can handle.

    I wrote to help another reader work through the pain and anger she felt after putting her dog to sleep. It may help you process your feelings, and move towards the peace that I know your beloved dog wants you to have. Dogs are naturally forgiving, compassionate, and accepting of life and death.

    May you feel the strength, energy, and love of your dog’s spirit and soul. May you find freedom from the burdens of guilt and pain, so your dog can rest in peace and so you can remember her with serenity and acceptance.

    In sympathy,

  45. I’m considering putting my dog down. He’s 13 years old. He’s lost his hearing and his eyesight is bad.
    I work , when he was younger, I could leave him alone for hours. He was able to control his toileting. I can no longer keep him caged for hours. I have to barricade him in the kitchen. And , when I come home , it’s such a mess. He also pees and poops in the house while I’m there. This has been going on for sometime now and I’m loosing my patience. It keeps me in such a nervous state. I feel that my life is being controlled by the dog to some extent. I guess I’m just looking for some reassurance that I’m not a terrible person, if I do make the decision to put him down.
    Thank you for your thoughts.

    • Teri, My adult daughter’s dog has been with us for 15 years. She, too, is quite deaf and has poor eyesight. She is taking meds for arthritic pain. She walks, but painfully. She sometimes falls on our smooth floors and needs help to get up. She often needs a boost to get back in the house after going outside. She no longer runs around the yard or is interested in playing. She is beginning to loose weight and is often restless–I think because she is so uncomfortable.We have found that we can no longer go away overnight and have someone else come and care for her or board her. I think it is probably time, but I am not sure my daughter is ready. Don’t feel guilty–you are NOT a terrible person–not if you are considering your dog’s quality of life and whether he can any longer enjoy his favorite activities. Not being able to control his body functions is stressful for him , too.

  46. Our beloved chihuahua-terrier was put to sleep Aug.30 and I am suffering extreme guilt. Only a week before, she became severely ill, first with panting in the early morning, followed two days later with severe vomiting and loss of appetite. We’d seen our vet at the first signs, but he didn’t ask to see her when the symptoms were worse. He sent us to the vet hospital for an ultrasound two days later, but by then she had tremors. The vet did not bother to talk to me, and when I asked the tech what the tremors meant, she said she didn’t know. Later the vet called about the ultrasound, saying our dear dog had pacreatitis. She then said she suspected brain tumor or stroke and giggled that a MRI would cost thousands. She shrugged off the fact that the poor dog had not eaten for four days. Finally, we brought her in because she was staggering, had violent tremors of the head, neck, and limbs, and was becoming glassy-eyed. I deeply regret not consulting with our regular vet, but he had pretty much sent our case to these incompetents. The next doctor blamed us for her condition, although she’d been in the hospital all day when she had the ultrasound. No one bothered to tell us how susceptible to hypoglycemia small dogs are. Her symptoms were consistent with that, but they all latched on to the one doctor saying “brain tumor” because of the trembling. Twelve hours of glucose IV had stopped the tremors, but directly contrary to this evidence, the doctor insisted there was no improvement. She, like all the other cold, condescending vets here, gave us nothing but bad news. This tough little dog had survived a week of starvation and was still able to walk and drink water, but the doctor dismissed any positive sign. She did advise that IV therapy usually is needed for three days, so we planned to see what the outcome would be. We came to visit and I was told that the vet in charge of her case would be there. She had not bothered to return my call and they said she was unavailable again. We went to visit our baby and were just leaving when we were accosted by the doctor on duty. She stated flatly, “I don’t know much about the case, but your dog will never recover or ever eat again. She has an incurable brain lesion.” No evidence, no proof, just spouting the party line. I asked how this was possible in one week, and she said it was very fast growing. She then asked us if we would like to take the dog home to say good-bye, but she said she might die outside the hospital. We were taken to a room to say good-bye, but when our precious dog was brought to us, she fell asleep peacefully in our arms. (We had just seen her in the ICU with bleary eyes and drooling.) I suggested to my daughter that maybe she could make it, but the poor girl had been influenced by the vet and said we should relieve her suffering. The guilt and regret come from not insisting that someone give a damn and treat her suffering, then from allowing an unqualified person to push us into euthanasia. It should be our carefully considered decision, not hers. I keep wondering what the outcome would have been if we had given her the full course of fluid therapy. Would she have rallied, recovered her appetite, and been with us for months more or maybe a year? She did have dementia but she had good moments. She also had molars that needed to come out but it would take a while before she was stable enough to go through that. There was no heart disease, no liver disease, blood pressure normal, coat still silky, no cancer. The pancreatitis had caused elevated BUN, but they didn’t give me the final number. I can’t understand why these doctors were so quick to give up when no one had even bothered to get a complete history. If only we told the last doctor that we were going to get a second opinion! Thank you for any advice you can offer.

  47. Dear Patti,

    As hard as it is to say this, it sounds like the right decision is to put Timmy to sleep. Your dog is not happy — he WAS happy because you loved him and gave him a wonderful life! — but now he is old. It’s time for him to find peace and freedom. He is suffering in his little doggy body, because he knows he should not be messing in the house but he can’t help it. He can sense your frustration and anger….and he knows you are grieved at the thought of putting him to sleep.

    You took such good care of Timmy for his whole life…and the greatest act of love and compassion might be to take care of him as he leaves this world. Putting a dog to sleep is a huge sacrifice. It’s painful and sad…and it might be the most loving last thing we do for our aged, ailing dogs.

    My prayer is that you find peace in your heart with whatever decision you make – whether you decide to put him down soon, or whether you decide to wait a bit longer. I also pray that you lay your hands on Timmy, and get a sense of what he wants you to do with his life. Is he ready to go? Open your heart, soul, and mind, and listen to his answer. If you sense he is done with this life and his little doggy body, I pray you are able to move forward with love and peace. Amen.

    In sympathy,

  48. I have had my Yorkie, Timmy, for over 14yrs now, 7 yrs ago we found he was diabetic, I have been giving him insulin 2x’s a day for more then 7 yrs. now. Overall, he and I have dealt well with this condition, however, along with diabetes blindness follows, and now his hearing is just not what it use to be. My Timmy LOVES to eat but his obsession is as much as right after he eats he wines for more food especially when he knows your making something or another family member is eating.. He has been urinating frequently in the house, and pooping everywhere. I do know its time but only because my husband says its time, and he is getting angry about it lately, but he will not do the duty of putting him down, he is leaving it all up to me to do the chore. I have put down all our animals in my life time, but this one seems to be the hardest because he has lived the longest of all my animals. My plan is to take him to MacDonalds and give him as many cheese burgers & French fries he can eat, and then make his last car ride before he goes. I know its the best thing, however, he still wags his tail, and wines and cries when I walk in the door as he always has, but so much mess over nite and all day long its beginning to smell like a kennel at times. I don’t know if my decision is because its what my husband wants or because it truly is time to put him down..I know he is not in pain but at time I wonder if his mind is in take.. At times I find myself getting extremely angry at Timmy, and hit him when he poops or pees in the house or wines to obsession over a bite to eat, and that I know I should NEVER do.. but I get so upset cause I m picking up poop and pee all day long or yelling at him to shut up!. he walks into walls and falls down our deck I have to watch him closely so he doesn’t get hurt. Its becoming a real chore to keep him safe. DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO?????????????? IS IT TIME????? )8

  49. It hurts so much now. My cat is very sick. His kidneys are failing . He’s 14 yrs old & I know I have to let him go, but damn, my tears are falling.

    • It only gets worse, Kidney disease it doesn’t get better. sorry to say. It may be time to do the right thing for your pet. but only you can say yes its time or not its not. but as I said Kidney disease doesn’t get better it only get worse, in time, and usually a short amount of time. May god watch over your cat and give you guidance.

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